Diary #22

I spy...

What did you see this month?

Dear September

Hiya September! 

You know September, I was really excited to see you. I had big hopes you were going to be good and you know what? YOU WERE! You were really nice to me, not like some other months. I really appreciate that. 

Quick Recap of the month:

• Tried dating again
• Saw my favorite doctor
• Still going to the gym often
• 20 year anniversary of September 11th
• Lots of outside time

The biggest thing this month, I feel was the 20th anniversary of September 11th. It was hard for me process and think about. How has it been TWENTY years already?! I was in 8th grade when it happened and for me to truly understand the magnitude of what happened. My dad, a fire captain, in a north Jersey city, was deployed that night to what would be called Ground Zero.  I remember sitting in eighth grade science class watching the live news report. I couldn't believe my eyes. I didn't understand it and it took me a long time to fully understand what happened. I wrote about September 11th here and here. 

On a brighter note, I got to see my favorite doctor and nurse this month. I was feeling back to my old self and I couldn't wait to tell them the good news. This doctor has been so awesome over the years and the biggest thing that makes me like him so much is that he listens to me and does not dismiss how I feel or what I say. It took me a long while to find him and from conversations with others with chronic illnesses, once you find doctor that actually listens to you, its like hitting the lottery. 

With the warm weather still hanging around, I tried to get in as much time outside as I could. Lots of walks around the neighborhood and Ocean Gate. One very unseasonably warm day late in the month, my dad and I went for a bike ride on the Rail Trail. Getting there I felt like Buddy the Elf, trying to get to Manhatten (And we had to pass through the gumdrop forest and ...) HA! Crossing Route 9 was pretty scary on my bike and then riding on the sidewalk was nervewracking. Once we got to the trail it was semi smooth sailing from there. We ended up riding over this little bridge that I have only seen from the street; the views from this bridge were so unexpectedly pretty. Maybe it was because we were out on such a beautiful day, maybe its because I was seeing it for the first time, who knows but I am sure glad to have seen it. It was a nice little surprise. 

I still kept up mostly with going to the gym and seeing my therapist. Slowly but surely working through both with vim and vigor noting some days were harder than others. 

Another big moment this month, I dipped my toes back into the dating pool again at the end of the month. I was super apprehensive about it after the mess from May and June. I had exactly one date and I thought it went really well. We hit it off, we had lots to talk about and we had a lot in common. I was hopeful and we made plans for a second date in October. I am curious to see where this goes. 

Welp! September,  you were good to me. Thanks for bringing Fall and the good memories! October! You're up!

[[We know that in September, We will wonder through the warm winds of summer's wreckage. We will welcome summer's ghost.- Henry Rollins]]

WGJ vol. 21

Hello Fall and hello new music. This month's playlist is filled with head bopping tunes that reminded me that Summer isn't really over until the end of September and it made me happy. 

WGJ vol. 21
Follow Me- Nelly, Chris Bandi
June, July August- Ryan Hurd
justified- Kacey Musgraves
These Hands- Josh  Bricker
One Mississippi- Kane Brown
Odds- Mat Kearney
Just Drive- Erin Kinsey
Live Without You- Michael Ray
Big In A Small Town- Jimmie Allen
LAST CALL- Niko Moon
Breakups-Acoustic- Seaforth
Remember or Not- Brandon Davis
Slow Burn- Zac Brown Band
Somewhere Cool With You- Adam Doleac
Take It Slow- Hayden Coffman
23- Sam Hunt
Hometown Boys- HIXTAPE, Dierks Bentley, HARDY, Matt Stell
I Can't Love You Any More- Mitchell Tenpenny
Run Out of Beer- Brandon Davis
Some Habits- Cole Swindell

Listen Here.

Diary # 21

 I spy...

What did you see this month?

Dear August

Howdy August!

First, lets do a recap of the month:

• still going to the gym, almost daily
• emotions seemed to be leveling out 
• took myself on a day date
• Productive days at work
• Binge watching Chicago Fire before premiere in 6 weeks
• Saw two rainbows
• Started Therapy again

This month was a good month;I started to really get back to myself and doing things that I love. I was still keeping up with going to the gym, almost daily which helped with my emotions and my moods. Then I decided to try crafting again. I had this great idea to make ornaments to see on my Etsy account for Christmas. I enjoyed making them for myself but I ended up putting that on the back burner for now. I also spent a lot of time outside- going for walks  and being by any body of water was really helpful with my emotions.

I think the scariest but best thing I did this month was start therapy again. I found and contacted my old therapist and we were able to get back into a routine. I was VERY nervous to get back into it; I hadn't seen her since May of 2020. I was trying very hard to figure things out on my own the last few months and it just wasn't working. I needed to get out of my head and get some tools to help me process everything. This was the best decision I made all year. 

One of the more random things that happened this month was I started binge watching Chicago Fire. I am not one to really watch any TV show on the regular and I've always strayed away from shows about firefighters because it was too nerve wracking to watch when my dad was a firefighter. Starting with Season 1, Episode 1 within the first 5 minutes, I was blown away (no pun intended) with the action and how real it all seemed.  I couldn't stop watching it. I found out that season 10 was premiering at the end of September. It had become my goal to finish all nine seasons in 8 weeks. Yes it sounded crazy and yes I did not know if I would be able to complete this. By the end of the month, I had 2 seasons to go, 24 episodes, I was close. 

One of my favorite things I did this month was take myself out on a day date. All summer, I took Wednesday's off and for my last Wednesday, I went big. I first had an eye doctor appointment which went surprisingly well. Then drove up to Freehold to stop at the Bagel Nook to get some yummy bagels then I went to the  Cheesecake Factory for lunch. It was a beautiful sunny, hot August afternoon, I opted to sit outside. That was the best decision I made; it was gorgeous. I was in the shade and the people watching was perfect. I indulged with a raspberry lemon drop and the best bread. Lunch was a chicken and avocado sandwich with french fries. YES it was as good as it sounded. I sadly did not have any room left for a slice of cheesecake. After a quick spin through the Freehold Mall, I was off to Hobby Lobby to wander around. I swear that store has everything a crafter could need. My perfect day ended with the gym and a funny text message from a gym friend. It was a great way to end the summer. 

August, you were pretty awesome. I feel like I am turning a corner and getting back into my old routine which was much needed and welcomed. I am curious to see what September holds for me and the new season. 

[[August is the slow gentle month that streches out the longest, across the span of the year. It yawns and lingers on with the light in its palms- Victoria Erickson]]

 

WGJ vol. 20

 Woah! Another month of music already?! Gosh, putting together these playlists are some of my favorite things to do, even if no one listens. This month's playlist was short and sweet. I've been busy listening to the sounds of nature. Enjoy.

WGJ vol. 20

All About That- Adam Sanders

Dirt Road Down- Travis Denning

Spin You Back to Me- Cameron Byfield

To Get a Girl- Josiah Siska

Wilder Days- Morgan Wade

Red Dress- CYLE

Do For Love- Danny Gokey, Angie Rose

Summer Nights- Forsaken, Colt Ford, Sam Grow

Tequila Does- Telemitry Remix- Miranda Lambert

Salt, Lime, Tequila- Ryan Griffin

 

Listen Here.

Diary #20

I spy....

What did you see this month?