Hello July!
Lets see the highlights for this month:
- Hot and Stormy
- Lots of outdoor time
- Disappointed by boys ....again
- re-evaulated social media and my phone
- struggled with emotions all month
Well, this was another odd month. Lets start with the good parts- I spent A LOT of time outside and that made me happy. I ran into a dog one day on the docks and I wanted to take him home. (Don't worry, I returned him to his dad.) I went paddleboarding, took myself on walks by the water, in the neighborhood and at the park; like I said last month, I love that I discovered being outside was really good for me.
Along with being outside a lot this month, the weather cooperated about half the time- it was such a rainy month. By the end of the month, I wasn't surprised when a storm popped up in the middle of a beautiful day. It felt like Florida- you know hot and steamy all day, a quick rainstorm that should have cooled everything down but it didn't, yup that was Jersey in July 2021.
I ended up deactivating my social media profiles because it got too much for me. My emotions were all over the place this month and I think the highlight reel of social media wasn't helping. I definitely felt a little better but there was still a lot to work through. I also ended up turning off a lot of the notifications on my phone. That was consistently a pain in my side, for the lack of a better term. I felt like the notifications were taunting me, showing me everything that I couldn't have.
Towards the end of the month, it became quiet clear that I needed to talk to my therapist again. I hadn't seen her since May of 2020, I think. It was becoming more apparent that I need to talk to someone. It would take me a few weeks to build up the courage to make the call, my stubborness was preventing me from opening up.
July was weird in so many ways and I struggled but I made it through... on to August.
[[I try to make this kind and clear, just a chance that maybe we'll find better days. -goo goo dolls]]
